Geckos
by I Caught Myself
Summary: G1: Oneshot. Just a little crack fic that came into my head. Spike and Bumblebee are out in the desert exploring and Bumblebee learns how to freak his best friend out.


**I have no idea where this crack fic came from – I blame my older sister and the random conversation about geckos we had the other day. Anyway, the plot bunnies attacked when I was doing my psychology homework and I couldn't keep them at bay *glares***

**Disclaimer:**** I do not own Transformers G1**

**Geckos**

"WOW!" Bumblebee said, running over to the rock and staring at a small reptile. "What's that Spike?"

"If you wait for me to catch up, I'll tell you." Spike called from behind Bumblebee. The mini-bot was still curious about everything that moved on Earth. Spike had taken Bumblebee out for a walk that afternoon to try and satisfy some of his curiosity, though he doubted he would.

"Hurry up!" Bumblebee scowled. "It might runaway!"

"Hang on Bumblebee." Spike panted, walking up beside the Autobot. His legs felt like lead from traipsing through the sand so he sat down, his back against the rock. "Let me get my breath back."

"What is it Spike?" Bumblebee said, picking the small creature up off the rock and shoving it in Spike's face.

"GET IT AWAY!" Spike screamed. He tried to move backwards, but only succeeded in hitting his head on the rock.

"Spike? Are you okay?" Bumblebee asked.

"GET. IT. AWAY." Spike snapped, clutching the back of his head with his hands.

"Are you hurt?" Bumblebee asked, crouching beside Spike.

"GET RID OF THE GECKO!"

"What's a gecko?"

"THAT!" Spike pointed to the reptile in Bumblebee's hand. "THAT'S A GECKO!"

"Why are you so freaked out by it?" Bumblebee asked, looking down at the gecko. The gecko looked at Spike, stuck it's tongue out, then licked it's eye.

"GET IT AWAY! GET IT AWAY!" Spike insisted, squeezing his eyes shut.

"Okay Spike, calm down." Bumblebee said, setting the gecko down on the ground. "It's not going to hurt you."

"I know it's not going to hurt me!" Spike protested. "BUT THEY LICK THEIR OWN EYES!"

"So?" Bumblebee asked.

"They lick their EYES." Spike snapped. "It's disgusting!"

"Well, you do some stuff that I find disgusting and I don't treat you like that." Bumblebee said, folding his arms.

"Oh yeah, like what?" Spike asked, standing up and brushing sand off his trousers.

"You talk with your mouth full." Bumblebee replied. "and you... ARGH YOU'RE BLEEDING!"

"It's just a scratch." Spike sighed, placing his hand on his head where it had struck the rock. He drew his hand away and looked it his fingers. They were covered in more blood than he expected.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Bumblebee asked.

"Yep." Spike replied. "Head wounds tend to bleed more anyway."

"We should probably head back." Bumblebee stated. "I don't want Sparkplug to kill me."

"Oh God..." Spike groaned. "He's going to make one hell of a fuss."

"Well if we go back now, we can sneak in and repair you." Bumblebee said, turning around and walking in the direction of _The Ark_.

"Bumblebee..." Spike called.

"What?" Bumblebee turned around. Spike was standing with his eyes closed, pointing to the ground. In front of him was the gecko from earlier.

"Get rid of it." Spike whimpered.

"You're such a wuss." Bumblebee sighed, walking over to the gecko and picking it up. Spike slowly opened his eyes and looked out the gecko in Bumblebee's hands.

"Thanks Bumblebee." Spike sighed with relief. The gecko licked it's eye and Spike screamed again.

-----------

Sparkplug was fixing something when Spike and Bumblebee arrived back at _The Ark_. Spike looked at Bumblebee and pointed to the door on the other side of the room. They tiptoed through the room and reached the door. Spike opened it and was about to sneak through Sparkplug turned around.

"Hey Spike, hey Bumblebee." Sparkplug waved. Spike and Bumblebee froze. "Why are you two trying to sneak past me?"

"No reason." Spike said quickly.

"Is that blood on your shirt?" Sparkplug asked, walking over to his son and his Autobot friend.

"No..." Spike started to say.

"What happened?" Sparkplug asked. "And where are you bleeding from?"

"I hit my head on a rock." Spike sighed, turning around and showing Sparkplug the graze on the back of his hair. It wasn't very big, but the hair around it was matted with blood.

"How did you hit your head on a rock?" Sparkplug asked. "Did you fall over?"

"No. I was already sitting down." Spike grumbled.

"We should probably get that cut cleaned up and dressed." Sparkplug said. "I guess these repairs will have to wait."

"Sparkplug?" Bumblebee asked. "Are you freaked out by geckos?"

"Not really, no." Sparkplug replied.

"BUT THEY LICK THEIR OWN EYES!" Spike protested. Bumblebee cracked up laughing. Sparkplug looked from Spike to Bumblebee.

"Would one of you mind explaining what's going on?" Sparkplug asked.

"Spike hit his head on the rock because he was trying to escape from a gecko!" Bumblebee laughed.

"Spike's scared of geckos?" Sparkplug asked, the corners of his mouth twitching in amusement.

"I am NOT scared of them!" Spike snapped. "It's just a bit freaky that they lick their own eyes..."

"Hey guys!" Chip Chase called, wheeling into the room, holding a box with air holes on his lap. "I thought I could hear you all arguing. I thought I'd stop by and drop something off for Perceptor."

"What have you got for him?" Spike asked. Chip usually brought something interesting for Perceptor to look at.

"I found this." Chip said, opening the box. He lifted a gecko out of it. Spike's face fell and Bumblebee and Sparkplug cracked up laughing. "What's wrong, Spike?"

"Nothing." Spike said through gritted teeth. The gecko licked its eye. "ARGH! GET IT AWAY!"

"Spike's scared of geckos!" Bumblebee jeered.

"Oh, I am going to make sure I talk with my mouth full from now on..." Spike glowered.

"Then I won't sit with you while you eat." Bumblebee grinned.

"I'll find some way to get you back..." Spike declared.

"Do you want to hold the gecko?" Chip asked, wheeling closer to Spike. Spike looked at it hesitantly. The gecko licked its eye.

"NO!" Spike shrieked.

**Wow, that was a waste of valuable revision time... but WAY more fun! :D**

**Drop me a line and tell me what you think!**


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